Challenging Aspirational Memes – Introducing The Toilet Door Series

Affirmations and aspirational statements and memes are everywhere on social media.  But are they inspirational, aspirational, motivational or just plain stressful if you aren’t quite there yet?

In this blog series, along with conversations on my facebook page, I’m hoping to challenge your perception of affirmations and aspirational statements.

Inspiration in the most unlikely place

My inspiration came from my favourite toilet (it’s a thing) at Thrive Wellness Hub, from where I operate my practice.  Behind the door is a hanging with 7 aspirational panels.  And it sparked a thought about what purpose affirmations and aspirational statements serve.  Especially given the reach of social media.  I feel like they can be two opposing things to people.  Inspiring … OR a stress point.  How do you feel if you feel you can’t make that aspiration real?  If your life, isn’t quite going to the aspirational plan?

And if you don’t or can’t aspire to the ideal, what realm then, do you occupy?

This is the first of a 7 part series, aptly named the Toilet Door Psychotherapy Series, looking at the 7 aspirations on that wall hanging behind the toilet door, and what they mean within the context of strategic hypnotherapy.  That is, asking what cognitive skills underlie the achievement of those aspirations as goals?  Because to achieve any goal, you need a pathway to achieve it.  Otherwise, it’s just wishful thinking, isn’t it?

Toilet Door Psychotherapy Series #1:  Live In The Present

Live in the Present.  So what are we talking about here through the strategic lens?

Primarily, there is a time orientation to how we think, and some important distinctions to be made for healthy and productive thinking skills.  From the strategic perspective, living in the present spans three tenses – past, present and future.

Our past experiences influence how we operate in the world.  Past traumas, and past joys as well as the everyday humdrum days.  Along the way, we learn about navigating relationships in our families, in our circle of friends, in workplaces and educational settings, in groups and in the wider community.  And with ourselves. 

How we think and how we feel today is influenced by our experiences, and how we manage those thoughts and feelings, and our various roles in our lives, is influenced by our past experiences.

Yet, here’s what it is not.  The past is not the present, as much as it informs it. 

From the strategic perspective, we ask what the choice point is here.  Something I spoke of in my first blog, on anxiety (click here to read), is the choice between acting with wisdom over other feelings.  This is about thinking skills, not just coping mechanisms.  This distinction is one of the perspectives that makes strategic psychotherapy so powerful. 

The wisdom of lessons from your past, inform your present response-ability.  In the present, that’s your choice point.  How do you respond?  How agile or flexible are you?  How skilful are you at choosing what thoughts and feelings to focus on, and what ones to ignore or let go of?

The choices you make in the present, create the future

Many people don’t even yet realise they have this power – to choose what thoughts and feelings to respond to, to act upon, to give the reigns to.  But they do.  If not you, then who does?  Who is in your head?

Why is that important to draw attention to in this context of living in the present?  Because here is the convergence of your past with your present.  Here is where your choices influence future consequences.

So here we are at the convergence point.  The present.  Where the wisdom of lessons from your past, inform your present response-ability, how do you can make the assessments, choices and decisions in the present, that are positive and productive and aspire to achieve the future you desire.

That might even sound like lot of pressure to you.  Talking about wisdom and present and future.  Yet it need not be that hard. 

We pass through moments in time, all the time.  And many are just ordinary parts of necessity and of everyday life…  what’s for dinner, school and work logistics, social engagements, etc.

The aspiration of Live in the Present, is about those moments when you do take pause to notice what you notice.  Because, while each moment before, is part of our past, our present moment will become part of our past also, because the future is next.  Are you with me?

Are things on track for where you want to head? 

 

Live In The Present

That’s the essence of ‘Live in the Present’.  The choice point – what action do you take?

Where do actions and choices come from?  From how you think and feel.  And the choice to act, supported by healthy, positive thinking skills, that help you do and achieve the things you need to, to create the life you want.

So that aspiration of Live in the Present belies a number of cognitive skills.  Strategic Hypnotherapy is a wonderful modality to help you achieve the distinctions of healthy and positive thinking skills with ease.  Because it’s not always easy to let go of past experiences, hurts and traumas.  And it’s not always easy to look to the future with optimism and positivity through anxiety or depression.

These are the things we work on with you in your personalised treatment plan.  Personalised, because although cognitive skills are identifiable patterns, you are unique, and your healing journey needs to be about you, your experiences and your goals.